Forum PMs:
Irenefc:
hi, hello...
sorry to disturb, are you busy? can we play a game together? it's nice knowing you.
me:
If by play you mean cyber and if by a game you mean in the butt then it's go time, girlie.
Irenefc:
Err...I mean games like broodwar, counter strike? In asia, most people arnt open minded.
me:
Lucky for you then that your mind isn't what must be open.
I begin to unbutton your shirt...
Irenefc:
i saw you online, are you currently busy? perhaps we can play broodwar together... or are you horny again
me:
I'm truly sorry, Irene. I may have spoken rudely with you in the past, because I was speaking through a whirlwind of thoughts which your dancing avatar's eyes have stirred up inside me. But now, without having seen the swaying goddess of the dance, trussed in the blue-white mantle of the left thread column, I feel I am speaking to you for the first time.
plz let me put it in the butt k thx
me:
I realize I probably gave you a hard one to swallow, but please consider your position on me.
Irenefc:
err.. what do i have to do?
me:
You can start by unzipping.
Do you have any photos? Any nudes? I don't care what you look like. I just want a face(++++) to go with the cyberz. We can trade!
me:
Please draw up a comic to illustrate our beautiful and exoticly passionate relationship. Make it as sexy as possible. Thanks.
Irenefc:
ERrr... since when did we have a relationship! *pinch you* but any request for me to draw is welcome, just give me a storyline.
Hope you like my comics, as much as i respect you
me:
Ok.
PANEL ONE:
I unbutton your blouse. You look like a little, submissive Asian girl who respects me a lot for undisclosed reasons.
PANEL TWO:
You're naked at this point, and you unzip my pants.
PANEL THREE:
Hot buttsex.
PANEL FOUR:
I make fun of people on a forum and you laugh at all my jokes because I'm awesome and you respect me.
IRC log:
* nikecc has joined #bwhacks
* fred_N sets mode: +v nikecc
<nikecc> it's down?
<cDeatH|Sandman> it's always down
* nikecc is now known as Irenefc
<Irenefc> it's just down?
<cDeatH|Sandman> always and forever
<Irenefc> when will it be up?
<cDeatH|Sandman> one day beyond the edge of eternity !!!
<cDeatH|Sandman> cyber?
* Irenefc look around
<Irenefc> ok now it's just you and me
<cDeatH|Sandman> :D :D :D :D :D
* Irenefc PINCH sandman really hard!!
<Irenefc> i'm not your sex slave! neh!!! *^^*
* cDeatH|Sandman puts on his cyber hat.
<Irenefc> hehe joing
<Irenefc> err, hi, sandman :D
<cDeatH|Sandman> that's alright baby I'll be the slave
<Irenefc> DT made me a mod 3 days ago, he ask me to help in comic section.
<cDeatH|Sandman> you tell me what to do
<Irenefc> err lets not discuss the sex things :p
<cDeatH|Sandman> damn girl don't tease me like that
<cDeatH|Sandman> blue balls isn't just a town in pennsylvania
<Irenefc> hehe...
<Irenefc> ah ya, sorry about earlier
<Irenefc> i was trying to post a comic, so... i wonder if it will be up soon?
<Irenefc> :(
<cDeatH|Sandman> clearly our love has overwhelmed the webserver
<cDeatH|Sandman> it's experiencing new and wonderful feelings
<Irenefc> probably you're sending lots of requests to the girls on the forum?
<Irenefc> haha :D
<cDeatH|Sandman> just you
<cDeatH|Sandman> because you've captured my eheart and won't let it go
<Irenefc> since when did i touch your heart ^^;
<Irenefc> furthermore it's E-heart? it's not realistic.
<Irenefc> boo.
<cDeatH|Sandman> it's about as realistic as I can be
<Irenefc> you can be a realistic gentleman only when you stop asking sexual requests :P
<cDeatH|Sandman> I'm just a machine
<cDeatH|Sandman> a cybersex machine
<Irenefc> hmm
<Irenefc> why do guys like to cybersex?
<cDeatH|Sandman> lube me up so I can be a well-oiled machine
<cDeatH|Sandman> I like to cybersex with you
<Irenefc> hmm...
<Irenefc> ok! if you can answer 3 of my general-knowledge questions
<Irenefc> i'll chat with you :D
<cDeatH|Sandman> oh man I hope they're about my boner
<cDeatH|Sandman> because I could certainly tell you a thing or two about that
<Irenefc> well, how many legs does a chicken have?
<cDeatH|Sandman> has this chicken had any injuries?
<cDeatH|Sandman> or any birth defects?
<Irenefc> nope
<cDeatH|Sandman> ok then it should have two, unless it's a john holmes chicken. then it has three.
<Irenefc> wow that's correct! two more.
<cDeatH|Sandman> YAY
<Irenefc> can chickens in the modern age fly?
<cDeatH|Sandman> that all depends on your definition of fly
<Irenefc> fly - in the air, flapping wings, moving forward.
<cDeatH|Sandman> well I don't think they could move forward on their own
<cDeatH|Sandman> unless of course it's a magic chicken
<cDeatH|Sandman> so no, chickens can't fly
<Irenefc> thats correct! chickens cannot fly.
<Irenefc> leaving you one more last question, ok?
<cDeatH|Sandman> ok
<cDeatH|Sandman> I'm so excited
<Irenefc> how many bones does a cat have?
<cDeatH|Sandman> what kind of cat?
<Irenefc> black cat, 2 years old, no defects.
<cDeatH|Sandman> 230
<Irenefc> wrong!
<cDeatH|Sandman> nuh-uh
<Irenefc> too bad. it's obvious that you know a lot about cocks, but nothing about pussy
<Irenefc> :P
<cDeatH|Sandman> well in that case it's about to have one bone in it
<cDeatH|Sandman> http://www.xmission.com/~emailbox/trivia.htm
<cDeatH|Sandman> 230 bones
<Irenefc> wow, thanks... we have learn something tonight :D
<cDeatH|Sandman> you're about to learn how to get freaky, girl
<Irenefc> but when your mind is working it's not possible that you're horny , lets learn something more?
<Irenefc> ah ya, once i was chatting with penpen, like for 30minutes.. then the server went up again ^^
<cDeatH|Sandman> my penis is way smarter than my head so i do all the thinking with it
<cDeatH|Sandman> so I'm TWICE as smart when I'm horny
<Irenefc> haha ^^;
<Irenefc> rofl
<Irenefc> so what are your brains used for?
<cDeatH|Sandman> mostly to hold my ears apart
<cDeatH|Sandman> now it's time to get into character
<cDeatH|Sandman> you're my little asian plaything
<cDeatH|Sandman> obey your strict but fair master
<Irenefc> hmm ok, lets have roleplay
<Irenefc> but i'll set the rules
<cDeatH|Sandman> ok
<Irenefc> you're the wife who watch TV at home while i entertain many clients at outside work. Now i'm just
back home
* Irenefc knocks the door
<cDeatH|Sandman> ok but you're about to get a huge surprise
<Irenefc> OPEN the door!
* cDeatH|Sandman opens the door
<Irenefc> hey you fat-bitch, what took you so long.
<cDeatH|Sandman> Sorry, got this rash
<cDeatH|Sandman> I was rubbing some gold bond on it
<cDeatH|Sandman> had to wash my hands
<Irenefc> another lame excuse! fine, whats for my dinner tonight?
* Irenefc walks in and slams the door
<cDeatH|Sandman> my cock, motherfucker
* cDeatH|Sandman whips out a ten inch rod of surprise
<cDeatH|Sandman> yeah, that's right. after ten years of marriage you haven't noticed that I have a dick
because you've never gone down on me!
<Irenefc> ah! you're a shemale!? shit man. i should have notice earlier. i want a divorce, fat women.
<cDeatH|Sandman> ok but I get the house
<Irenefc> yeah sure. you go ahead and take the barbie doll's house. Ken's car as well.
<Irenefc> now get lost!
* Irenefc kicks sandman out of his house
* Irenefc throw all sandman's cloths out
<cDeatH|Sandman> hey this is bullshit
<Irenefc> haha ^ ^
<cDeatH|Sandman> not only am I the woman, and thus entitled to the house because I'll cry in court
<cDeatH|Sandman> but I have the bigger cock in this relationship
<cDeatH|Sandman> you're my bitch
<Irenefc> err sandman
<Irenefc> i dont want to roleplay anymore
<Irenefc> i just wish the forum will be up again
<Irenefc> :(
<cDeatH|Sandman> well wish in one hand and cyber in the other
<cDeatH|Sandman> see which one gets the stickiest
<Irenefc> i dont know how girls think of cyber on your area, but i dont really like the idea.
<cDeatH|Sandman> it's ok
<cDeatH|Sandman> it's your first time
<cDeatH|Sandman> the first time can be painful
<cDeatH|Sandman> but you just keep going at it and one day you'll love it and you won't be able to keep your
chat windows closed
<cDeatH|Sandman> I promise I'll be more gentle
* cDeatH|Sandman turns the lights down low
* cDeatH|Sandman puts on some barry white
<Irenefc> ^ ^;
* Irenefc penguin slap sandman left and right and left and right and left and right
<Irenefc> :ppppppppppp
<cDeatH|Sandman> yea that's how I like it, girl
<Irenefc> - -;;
<Irenefc> i rather hug penguin then to touch you
<Irenefc> !
<cDeatH|Sandman> have you ever hugged a penguin?
<Irenefc> no ^^;
<Irenefc> shall we play starcraft?
<cDeatH|Sandman> I think if you tried it you wouldn't say that
<cDeatH|Sandman> yea girl I'll play all through the night
<cDeatH|Sandman> and if there's no grass on the field I'll play in the mud
<Irenefc> i'm sure penguins are soft soft and cute cute
<cDeatH|Sandman> penguins are mean little critters
<cDeatH|Sandman> with razor-sharp beaks
<cDeatH|Sandman> they're cunning hunters with amazing stunts
<cDeatH|Sandman> and I'm a stunning hunter for amazing cunts
<Irenefc> in the penguin world, the male will protect its baby, standing there for shelter , keeping the egg
warm for weeks.
<Irenefc> Thus i like guys who wants to be a penguin, the ability to protect family, to love the female, to
hunt for food.
<Irenefc> and it's so cute.
<Irenefc> it's a creature that man should be evolved into. :P
<cDeatH|Sandman> because the male is a much strong protector than a female to ward off horny sea lions
<cDeatH|Sandman> but we won't have to worry about sea lions, baby
<Irenefc> yeah, right ^ ^; so how you know about the sea lions?
<cDeatH|Sandman> I used to live in a marine biology lab in argintina
<cDeatH|Sandman> they said they needed some sea men so I signed up, since I am the world's number one
proprietor of that sort of thing
<cDeatH|Sandman> thanks to cuties like you
<cDeatH|Sandman> ;)
<Irenefc> i didnt ask you to publish news papers?
<Irenefc> :P
<Irenefc> ah ya, why is your nick sandman?
<Irenefc> childhood memories about sand?
<cDeatH|Sandman> if you stimulate me there's no telling how much I'll throw to you
<Irenefc> i'll throw up first if you ask me to stimulate you
<cDeatH|Sandman> I meant you interest me and ask me questions
<cDeatH|Sandman> you have a dirty mind
<cDeatH|Sandman> I like it
<Irenefc> hmm...
<Irenefc> ah ya, i send you my drawing, ok?
<Irenefc> would like your comments ^ ^
<cDeatH|Sandman> ok
<cDeatH|Sandman> that's hot
<Irenefc> notice anything?
<cDeatH|Sandman> doesn't follow my story line, though
<Irenefc> hmm
<cDeatH|Sandman> I notice that no one is naked
<Irenefc> i try to design sandman's costume
<Irenefc> so thats you on the left
<Irenefc> then i draw a girl beside you :o
<cDeatH|Sandman> OHH ok
<Irenefc> i've upload a sandman pic on your 'welcome new user' thread
<Irenefc> it's the same person ^ ^
<cDeatH|Sandman> except now he's on the verge of getting some action
<cDeatH|Sandman> hell yea
<Irenefc> ya so in my knowledge you look like that character
<Irenefc> ^ ^
<cDeatH|Sandman> cool that one's a little more polished
<cDeatH|Sandman> now, speaking of polishing..
<Irenefc> that's the original :o
<cDeatH|Sandman> wow your hair is friggin long
<cDeatH|Sandman> lots to grab on to when I'm sladdlin' up
<cDeatH|Sandman> or saddlin'
<Irenefc> ....
<Irenefc> sandman i'm bored :~(
* Irenefc shakes you
<Irenefc> why isnt the forum up
<cDeatH|Sandman> hell yes now you're talking
<Irenefc> ^^;
<cDeatH|Sandman> except put more rythm to the shaking
<cDeatH|Sandman> in fact, change shakes to strokes
<Irenefc> ah
<Irenefc> pen pen is online on msn ^^
<Irenefc> hmm
<cDeatH|Sandman> he's horrible at cybering
<Irenefc> i send you an asian song ok?
<cDeatH|Sandman> I don't have speakers
<Irenefc> prh.
<Irenefc> orh .
<cDeatH|Sandman> I don't know what you're trying to say but I'm hard as hell
<Irenefc> penpen's working
<Irenefc> :(
<cDeatH|Sandman> I'm working, too
<cDeatH|Sandman> and you should be working
<cDeatH|Sandman> working that ass
<Irenefc> it's night time here
<cDeatH|Sandman> really?
<cDeatH|Sandman> what are you wearing?
<Irenefc> ....
<Irenefc> BOSS! YOUR EMPLOYEE ISNT WORKING, BUT RATHER, DISTURBING PEOPLE (GIRLS) OVER THE GLOBE!
* Irenefc shouts ^ ^
<cDeatH|Sandman> my boss is far more disturbing than I am
<Irenefc> - -;
<cDeatH|Sandman> and he has a lot more money
<cDeatH|Sandman> do you need a job?
<cDeatH|Sandman> how'd you like to work for our worldwide pleasure distribution service?
<cDeatH|Sandman> of course the majority of it would be local business
<cDeatH|Sandman> namely: under my desk
<cDeatH|Sandman> great dental plan
<Irenefc> hmm
<Irenefc> bwhack is still down
<Irenefc> i'll go take a rest :D
<Irenefc> goodnight sandman
<cDeatH|Sandman> alright girl, you go rest up a bit and let me know when you're ready to go again
<cDeatH|Sandman> I hope it was as good for you as it was for me